HOW I WENT FROM CAREER FOCUSED TO KID FOCUSED & HOW I FOUND SATISFACTION AND VALUE IN BEING A MOTHER AS I DID IN MY CAREER
I threw a 3-year tantrum, that’s how.
LOL>
I wish I was joking, but this is the truth on many levels.
I loved my career. Despite its stresses and dark moments, I enjoyed the creative freedom it provided, the projects it presented, and the person it showed me I was.
15 years ago, I would have told you that I didn’t possess the characteristics I would use to describe myself today. Instead, I would have used phrases such as “I do design” or “I am a photographer”…
But because of my career, and its ability to have stretched me beyond what I thought my limits were, I know now that even though I am damn good at the design aspect, my core strengths aren’t in that category like many of those who are in my industry.
Now my strengths sound something like this:
Given time, I can figure out most anything.
I can troubleshoot like no other.
I am a great strategist and long-term thinker.
I have clarity and vision with projects, and I can dial in on micro aspects in crazy ways while keeping big vision/scope in mind.
I have an almost maddening ability to point out off scaling, color or quality differences. (My friend Cathy and all home contractors hate this. LOL.)
I have a thrifty mind with an eye for quality.
I don’t mind setbacks.
I don’t mind lunatic deadlines.
I love collaboration
I can deal with challenging people.
I can convince most anyone of anything if I truly believe in it.
I was proud of the person I had built and the career I had created along the way. So when all that went bye-bye virtually overnight, so did I. Or so I told myself.
I used to believe I was just the person keeping everyone above water. I would brush off the compliments on how well I juggled twins, comments on how I seemed to deal with the bumps of parenthood, and praise on how I could recognize nuances and relate to the babes on their level. Those things just seemed normal to me, not unique or special. They did not strike me as gifts or strengths. I would repeat to myself that I was just the cook, housekeeper, and caretaker because I felt no value and could be replaced. So these became my mantras in a sense… and that’s who I let myself be until I became so uncomfortable with what was looking back at me that I went in search of who I know myself to truly be.
And then life shifted. I realized the reward is being me — not the job I hold. I value motherhood because I value myself and choose to celebrate the decisions that got me here.
Motherhood is a gift given to me, just like my career. It is an opportunity. It is my creation. It’s up to me to make something out of it while giving gratitude to my skillset — because I’d be in the weeds without those skills. And that, my friends, is satisfying to know.
— The Essentialyst